Bipolar + Borderline Personality Disorder Awareness
Stop the Stigma
I Hope it will help some of you when explaining your illness to others
Dear husband, wife, brother, boyfriend, girlfriend, sister, son, daughter and friend. I thought I would write you a story about dealing with mental illness. A few words to explain. We have been diagnosed with an invisible disorder. It is something you cannot see, it is something that you cannot understand if you do not have it yourself. But we love you in the same way that we wish for you to love us back. So we hope that you will try to understand a little bit better by educating yourself about our illness.
We are often so lost. Sometime in our past a doctor told us that we have disorder. At first we did not know what it was. Then we read about it, our doctors told us more about it and how it's a chemical imbalance of our brain and that medicine helps to regulate it (just as a diabetic patient would use) and we joined support groups. By now we know a lot about it, but is does not make it better. There is no cure for this illness but there is plenty of help out there. We just need a little extra patience and a little more understanding.
Sometimes we get a depression that is so overwhelming that it feels as if someone laid a ton of bricks on our chests. We can’t breathe, we can not think straight everything just feels hopeless. We get severe anxiety. Sometimes we cannot face food, we cannot face anything but the wall. We sleep a lot or not at all. Then, some of us drink, or take drugs, self medicating in an attempt to make the pain a little bit better.
Some of us take medication. Sometimes it works and we can maintain stability. Sometimes it makes you feel like you want to die. Some medications give you nightmares, others make you sweat, others causes ticks and spasms in your face and hands. Some medications makes you nauseous, gain weight, others takes away your desire for love making. Some of us cannot afford medication and have to face the repercussions.
Sometimes we are manic and reckless. Over talkative, little if any sleep and we do things that we later regret, but we do not have control over it. Sometimes we get so angry that it borders on rage, at what will seem for no reason at all. Sometimes we are terrified you will leave us so we say stupid thing's. Sometime's we feel that were not quite good enough. But then we then feel guilty for the anger, the paranoia, the accusations, the impulsive behaviour which can lead to you wanting to give up on us and leave. Please know 9/10 times these feeling have nothing to do with you or anything you have done. It is the chemical imbalance that make's us feel like this, and we are sorry for that.
Sometimes we feel so lost and sad. We get so depressed all we want to do is sleep. Misinterpreting this and thinking we are lazy can make it worse. Sometimes we wish that we could just be ok, just function like every one else. But we cannot. We are the way we are and the only thing that makes it better is our fight and your support your love and your care.
Please don't take this illness for weakness, we can deal with everything life throw's at us, treating us like a china doll will not help the situation. Please trust in us, believe in our strength. Do not hide thing's from us in fear that we will not be able to cope. We are probably more equipped than most to deal with hard situations. We are human being's just like you and were stronger than you might think. We want above all to be treated as normal. We have an illness we are not our illness.
So this is to say thank you to all of you that deal with us every day. We know that we are not easy people to deal with . We know that we often hurt and make it difficult and for that we are sorry. But we want to tell you that we also love you so much and we would not be able to cope with this life if it was not for you and your wonderful love and care.
So to all of you. Thank you ♥
